Practical Decisions I wish I made

I must say: anyone who has not experienced swimmer’s ear is a lucky duck. I know a statement like that begs the story…
It all started the first day I started house-sitting my Uncle and Aunt’s house. The family left for a family reunion and left me with a BEAUTIFUL backyard, pool, comfy living room, and open kitchen (which screams TINA!). I spent my first afternoon laying out, which we all know gets a little toasty; I dove into the pool to cool off before letting the sun work on my other side. I didn’t notice anything unusually obnoxious about my head…until the next morning.
Now, if any of you have ever tried to listen to a quiet conversation with those DJ ear-thingys in than you understand how I felt. You know how DJ’s are frequently seen with one ear covered by an ear-thingy and the other open (maybe to hear the crowd or requests). That is EXACTLY how I felt…except I DID NOT put those ear-thingys on. My first few steps from bed were very confused because I could not figure out why on Earth I was dizzy and slightly disoriented.
I thought, hoped really, that this swimmer’s ear problem would clear itself up…mostly because I HIGHLY DISLIKE doctor’s visits. It changed, from DJ ear-thingys to lumberjack earplugs, and eventually progressed to the irritating white noise mess I got this morning. In an irritated cave in I decided to go to the doctors. As I said, I dislike the doctors so I was expecting a crap day. It turns out that my doctor has been to Africa; and a twenty-minute conversation about Africa’s plight unfolded. I was happy to find an intelligent doctor whom I agree with on important actions to help the people and unnecessary disadvantages we’ve projected on them. It was great; I actually forgot to ask any questions about my ear…I simply took my prescription and left with a smile on my face.
Hope was restored that maybe I could have a good day. I also had a BRILLIANT conversation with my ROCKSTAR boyfriend that actually made me forget how irritated I was (he has that gift). Then, of course, I lost the prescription before I could even turn it in and my pitiful pessimistic opinion return and I made cynical comments like,” I hate today,” and my mom just walked in front of me (I think to avoid looking at my scowl). Anywho...I convinced her to go with me to drop my car off at the shop (it’s been working on my nerves lately). I was feeling upset and frustrated, but if I had eagle eyes I would have realized the day was pretty even washed…it was more my decision to pick what sort of day I wanted. I chose to have a bad day today…until I opened Richard Foster again this evening…I got words of wisdom like this:

“”Let him who cannot be alone beware of community…let him who is not in community beware of being alone…Each by itself has profound pitfalls and perils. One who wants fellowship without solitude plunges into the void of words and feelings, and one who seeks solitude without fellowship perishes in the abyss of vanity, self-infatuation, and despair” (97). ~quoting Dietrich Bonheffer

“Simply to refrain from talking, without a heart listening to GOD, is not silence” (98). Which punched me in the face, because I tried to be quiet today in order to not decapitate someone.

“”Thomas a Kempis writes, ‘It is easier to be silent altogether than to speak with moderation.’” (99). Which is a GOD-smacking irony because I am nowhere near mastering my tongue. James beat me up last week, and GOD followed it up with this sort of wisdom…

“Silence is one of the deepest disciplines of the spirit simply because it puts the stopper on all self-justification” (101). Which was hard to read considering I justified my attitude today with all the circumstances I could pick at.

“The tongue is a thermometer; it gives us our spiritual temperature. It is also a thermostat; it regulates our spiritual temperature. Control of the tongue can mean everything” (101).

“The fruit of solitude is increased sensitivity and compassion for others. There comes a new freedom to be with people. There is new attentiveness to their needs, new responsiveness to their hurts. Thomas Merton observes, ‘It is in deep solitude that I find the gentleness with which I can truly love my brothers. The more solitary I am the more affection I have for them…Solitude and silence teach me to love my brothers for what they are, not what they say” (108).

What a BEAUTIFUL quote…I could read that over and over for a few days and find new things each time. Examples from my own life that remind me of GOD’s touch.